First Appearance: Having confidence is about being sure of your actions and appearance. Being around a woman you find attractive can make the confidence of many men plummet. You might consider yourself a confident person, but when confronted with an intimidating and beautiful woman, that confidence might disappear. Appearing confident to women is a fine lineman must balance. Displaying too much confidence could be considered cocky, which is can be a turn-off to women. Consider the following steps for tips on how to come off as confident.
1. Dress well and groom your face and body.
- Wear clothing that is both comfortable and classy. Pick a style and stick with it from your tie to your shoes. Add flair to your outfit by including a personal touch. This can be a funky tie, a unique watch, or an interesting belt. Showcasing your personality exhibits the confidence you have in your own self.
- Trim your beard, mustache, goatee, etc. so that it appears clean and put together. Having a clean face and facial hair can make you feel fresh and give you more confidence than if you just rolled out of bed.
- Cut your fingernails, trim the hairs in your ears and nose, and wash your hair. If you style your hair regularly, do so. Avoid trying radical new hairstyles when trying to impress a woman. The uncertainty of the new style might make you lose confidence.
2. Speak slowly and avoid rambling.
- Try to slow your speech down by at least 50 percent. When you’re nervous, your voice tends to raise an octave and you begin speaking faster.
- Focus on being calm when speaking. If you think about each word before you say it, you will slow down automatically. This can also prevent you from misspeaking and having to put your foot in your mouth during conversation.
- Stay on topic with the conversation. Say only as much as the conversation requires. Once you answer a question, do not continue to speak to fill the silence.
3. Smile often.
- Practice a genuine smile in the mirror. A genuine smile is not too cheesy or large. It feels comfortable when you do it and doesn’t come off as creepy to others. A genuine smile shows confidence, and a genuine laugh is even better.
4. Keep steady eye contact.
- Look at the woman whom you are talking to or listening to for as long as you or she is speaking. Men who aren’t confident tend to have wandering or shifty eyes. When a woman speaks directly to a man with little confidence, the man usually has a hard time returning a strong gaze. This shouts nervousness.
5. Try not to over-think your actions.
- Understand the meaning of your words, but do not go over every conversation in your head after or during.
- Try not to over-think an action such as pouring a drink or lifting a glass to your mouth. Over-thinking these basic actions puts an emphasis on them, and the extra pressure you exert on the situation can cause you to mess up when you otherwise wouldn’t have.
6. Remember to breathe.
- Speak at a natural pace and breathe often. When people get nervous, they sometimes forget to breathe. When they finally do breathe, it causes them to blurt out their words.
7. Watch your posture.
- Stand up as straight as you can. Pull your shoulders back and lift your head up. If you do one thing when trying to appear confident, it should be maintaining perfect posture.
- People who slouch appear sloppy, unkempt, and timid. You will feel more confident immediately once your posture is straight.